Is it ever silly of me to think that I can do it all? As a woman, we all seem to do that. We women try to do it all. But isn't it because that is what is expected of us? Is that not what we were taught? Is that not what we've seen our mothers, aunts and grandmothers before us do? So, is it our fault that we do the very same thing?
I see my oldest daughter doing the very same thing. She's working, going to school and she's a mother, and yes, she is still in a relationship. I try to guide her, sometimes I do too much, and I have to take a step back, because it is her life, she has to learn to find that balance for herself. Though she lives with us, her dad and me, we do feel very responsible for what her outcome in life is. And that is where we sometimes make the choice of when to butt in, or let go. Because eventually, we have to let go, (even though in our hearts we never do).
So here I am, still wearing so many hats. In between all of these, I am trying to carve a self identity. To focus on what I do want this life to give to me. Yes, I have the man that I love who loves me in return, I do have three beautiful children, I have others who I care about, but I have not reached that pivotal point where I can sit back and say I am content. I so want to be able to do that. It doesn't mean having riches, it just means that I have accomplished my dream.
It is difficult for most women to just let go and let the different aspects of their lives fall into place, we can't because if we don't do it, then who will? I guess we have control issues then uh? Sigh~ I certainly hope not. I sure hope it is just because we want to make the people in our lives happy and so we engineer as much of our daily lives as we can, but we can't do it all. This is where our faith in ourselves and our belief in our faith comes in. We have to learn to let go and trust in that which we believe in to guide us. We learn to live in the moments, letting go of that which we have no control of, while accepting that which we can control in our lives. It is through these moments that I continue to learn and go on to fulfill those unrealised dreams!
I see my oldest daughter doing the very same thing. She's working, going to school and she's a mother, and yes, she is still in a relationship. I try to guide her, sometimes I do too much, and I have to take a step back, because it is her life, she has to learn to find that balance for herself. Though she lives with us, her dad and me, we do feel very responsible for what her outcome in life is. And that is where we sometimes make the choice of when to butt in, or let go. Because eventually, we have to let go, (even though in our hearts we never do).
So here I am, still wearing so many hats. In between all of these, I am trying to carve a self identity. To focus on what I do want this life to give to me. Yes, I have the man that I love who loves me in return, I do have three beautiful children, I have others who I care about, but I have not reached that pivotal point where I can sit back and say I am content. I so want to be able to do that. It doesn't mean having riches, it just means that I have accomplished my dream.
It is difficult for most women to just let go and let the different aspects of their lives fall into place, we can't because if we don't do it, then who will? I guess we have control issues then uh? Sigh~ I certainly hope not. I sure hope it is just because we want to make the people in our lives happy and so we engineer as much of our daily lives as we can, but we can't do it all. This is where our faith in ourselves and our belief in our faith comes in. We have to learn to let go and trust in that which we believe in to guide us. We learn to live in the moments, letting go of that which we have no control of, while accepting that which we can control in our lives. It is through these moments that I continue to learn and go on to fulfill those unrealised dreams!
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