Confession

I am not where I want to be right now. This is my confession.  More for myself than for anything or anyone else. What is it about us that makes us not take the chances in our lives that might get us where we want to be?  For some people, this is how it is, but my dear reader, that person is not me!  I did take a few chances, I did do a few things out of the box, but at the first sign of failure I ran for the hills, and never looked back.  I see others who did take their chances and they ran with it, and stayed the course, and they're in a much better place for it.  More power to them!  You don't want to leave yourself open to being vulnerable, because you don't want others to think less of you; or you let what they think hinder you.  But you know what?  There will always be someone who will think they are better than you, just because they have what you don't, a house, a better car, more money, seemingly a better life.  And there are some who take the greatest of pleasures in reminding you about it, every chance they get.  Rubbing your nose in it because they think they are better than you, looking down their noses as if you're nothing but a speck of sand!  And I guess sometimes you get in a safe place, set up your own little shop, and you don't move; this is my confession.

You don't move because you're too afraid to upset the walls around you lest they fall.  And sometimes you're too afraid because of the things you go through, some of the things that you've been through, and other things that stops you in your tracks, as if life stood still and you have been sleeping this entire time!  Then you wake up and wonder, what the fuck have I been doing with my life for the last ten years?  Where have I been?  What have I been doing?  You wonder and hope there is a good explanation for it!

Now that you're awake, now that I'M AWAKE, now that I've confessed, I hope to complete the pieces of my puzzle and continue on.  Taking no prisoners and getting to that place where I want to be.  For once, leaving the naysayers out of my head, and letting me just be me.  It doesn't matter what they think; it doesn't matter what the other person thinks.  It matters what I think, it matters that I find my own voice, that I find my own path and that I climb that hill, get to the top of it, and plant my own flag!  

Don't sit and wait for your life to pass you by.  Use this day, this wonderful time of the year, Easter, the day that our Lord has risen from the death that he died for each of us.  Use it as your day of renewal, to find yourself, to start over - if you will; to make the changes you need to make so that you can find fulfillment in what you do.  Now that I've confessed, and put it "out there" into the Universe, I am calling upon the goodness of my Faith, the destiny that will be my fate.   We can do this.  You can do this!  Yeah, I'm talking to you who needed this kick in the pants too! We will do this!