I keep telling myself that, to just breathe. Whenever life gets a bit too much to handle, whenever I think too much. I remind myself to take a moment and remember to breathe.
I told myself that as I held my son on my shoulder telling him it's going to be OK, "Mom is here" as I dialed 911. I've had to do that before, dial 911. I think the only time that I dialed 911 and it wasn't for me (meaning a family member), it was because I came upon the scene of an accident and I dialed quickly being in traffic and having to move quickly along so as not to make matters worse, but saying a prayer hoping that the person involved would be alright.
One of the last time I dialed 911, and ended up at the hospital, I was praying for my mom to be alright, but this time I was praying that my son would be too. It was difficult and easy at the same time. Difficult because of all the thoughts that ran through my head, thoughts that included the moment I knew my mom was moving on as I watched them work on her, that time; and easy, because I had to keep my wits about me and give my son reassurance, this time. Thankfully, he was ill, but his illness is recoverable, and eventually he will be in top shape again!
I have said that I write because it helps me to process my thoughts, it does. But there are times when writing becomes the hardest thing for me to do. This was one of those times, I couldn't do it until I was ready (though I mentioned my day briefly in my tweets later that night). Because just the thought of putting this experience "on paper" would have had me in tears. I am processing it, but I cannot go into details, even now, however, I'm happy to report, my son is getting back to his old self again. And so I can smile and I can let go of that moment because our trip to the emergency room, was just a trip, thank you Lord, for making it so!
I told myself that as I held my son on my shoulder telling him it's going to be OK, "Mom is here" as I dialed 911. I've had to do that before, dial 911. I think the only time that I dialed 911 and it wasn't for me (meaning a family member), it was because I came upon the scene of an accident and I dialed quickly being in traffic and having to move quickly along so as not to make matters worse, but saying a prayer hoping that the person involved would be alright.
One of the last time I dialed 911, and ended up at the hospital, I was praying for my mom to be alright, but this time I was praying that my son would be too. It was difficult and easy at the same time. Difficult because of all the thoughts that ran through my head, thoughts that included the moment I knew my mom was moving on as I watched them work on her, that time; and easy, because I had to keep my wits about me and give my son reassurance, this time. Thankfully, he was ill, but his illness is recoverable, and eventually he will be in top shape again!
I have said that I write because it helps me to process my thoughts, it does. But there are times when writing becomes the hardest thing for me to do. This was one of those times, I couldn't do it until I was ready (though I mentioned my day briefly in my tweets later that night). Because just the thought of putting this experience "on paper" would have had me in tears. I am processing it, but I cannot go into details, even now, however, I'm happy to report, my son is getting back to his old self again. And so I can smile and I can let go of that moment because our trip to the emergency room, was just a trip, thank you Lord, for making it so!
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