I'm going to whine, if you don't want to read my whining, stop reading here now. I know, it seems like the trend in my writing lately, right?!. Hey, I've always said my blog was therapy...so get over yourself - believe me, I'm trying to do that too! In the mean time, I'm gonna do what I do, so deal!
Today I'm feeling like "I can't", I just cannot. I want to stop, dream no more, bother with anything...absolutely nothing...because honestly, that's how I feel.
I am at the mercy of the turbulent emotions going on inside of my head, and my heart! It's just not pretty and I guess if I were to sit down and drink myself into oblivion, well,
I might just feel better until I wake up with a massive hang over. Or I could cry myself to a whimpering drool of spittle & snot....but I would have red, puffy eyes and a massive headache, plus I don't cry pretty! But,
I'm so over feeling sorry for myself so...that's not happening! ~sigh~
I received a phone call from a loved one who
had a serious happening and that sobered me. Scared me into, "what the shit...?"....then I had a conversation with someone else about their loved one who happens to be seriously ill, just out of the blue...."OMG...so young, I'm so sorry" And as I read the news online and read of one thing or another...well, it dawned on me that what I'm going through, well, I'm still lucky! I was reminded that I am at least trying to change my situation....just because what I'm doing isn't working doesn't mean it's the end. Delayed doesn't mean no.
DELAYED DOESN'T MEAN I'M DENIED. I must just continue in faith and know that Jesus has me, he's got my back!
So I promise to say a prayer about the news of illnesses I heard. Both are very dear to my heart, especially my loved one. So my whine is now a whisper of prayer, and a song of praise to the Divine one. There will be moments such as these in your life. How you choose to deal with it, well, that is your business. However, I hope you will think about this article, and remember that in God, your Faith, and/or the Universe of Possibilities, you can trust!
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